Three Things: What I learned losing in a gold medal match

Three Things I Learned in Saas, Sports, Tech & Live Events In 1997, we lost the gold medal match in volleyball junior nationals to a Reebok team from San Diego. There's a picture, which I can't find, of us with our hands on our hips watching them celebrate. It was the second time they'd beaten us that day solidifying the fact they were better than us- despite our winning six matches that day to earn the rematch. No questions left to ask. At that time in my life, that gold medal was one of the most important goals to me. And we lost. It felt different. It changed me. What I've learned in life from losing in a gold medal final. 1) Usually, when we lose, we grieve. And that grief is amplified by 'what ifs.' What if I'd practiced harder. Lifted more. Changed the offense. Would we have won? But in this case, unlike losses before, I felt no regrets and it was very strange. No second guessing. I was accepting reality: they were better than us. I did everything I could for years leading up to that day. That tournament was the best I'd ever played - by a lot. We still lost. And it was more okay than I thought it would be in the moment. It was surreal. There is freedom in going for it all when we do our very best. Even if we don't get there. Knowing so helped us take the chances we've taken here. 2) Losing is like anything else - louder in the moment. We had been assembled two years earlier with a single goal- Gold in 1997 in the 18 Open division. From there we grew up together. When I got home, I handed the medal to my dad and told him "I never want to see it again." My dad, far wiser than I, went and had it framed. I wasn't proud of it in the moment, but he was plenty proud for us both. I still haven't seen it- 20+ years later. But now I'd like to. And I'd look at it with a lot of pride today than I did then. Don't destroy the accomplishment in the heat of the moment. You'll never know what you're most proud of as time passes. For me, now, having kids playing volleyball and seeing just how rare it is, just knowing I was there and on the court makes me smile. Ah the good ol' days…. 3) It really does make you stronger but not in the way you'd think - even when you can't see it in the moment. I could insert a million movie clips, from Rocky to Batman to the Avengers, of the unbeatable protagonist losing to the super villain, regrouping, and returning stronger to defeat said villain. Reality imitates art. Knowing we can lose, tasting our own blood, and coming back - that creates a different kind of confidence. There's less fear of losing the next time. There'll be another gold medal match in our lives. It'll just take a different form. Nike Santa Cruz 1997